Our own pad in PI

Sometimes, things happen for a reason. But as I learned the hard way - often times, you have to give a reason for things to actually take place.

We are planning to move to our own place by 3/15 and I'm still having mixed emotions about it. Although I know that it is the natural thing to do, like what we did not long ago - I feel uneasy about the idea.

Maybe its because we never really had a good enough experience to take whenever we decide to get a place of our own. We always end up either folding up too soon, because we can afford it. Or move out from the flat because we failed to manage our monthly finances.

I know that it will be another big adjustments for everyone in my family. I'm just hoping that this time, we could stick around longer.

I like the idea of having your own place. I mean, who wouldn't. But despite my enthusiasm, I cannot hide the fact that I am also mortified. Scared of the truth that we might end up repeating the same mistakes we did in the past. Scared shitless that this will be once again, another exercise in futility.

I beg to differ about everyone else's opinion of money matters and financial management. I feel that somehow, I should know better than they are since I've experienced these challenges several times over in the past.

Believe it or not, after everything that I've been through, I'm still clueless as to whether or not we'll be able to pull this off... but I got to do what I got to do...

This time around... I need to do a good job...